You need an action plot. Sword and sorcery is not a field of deep psychological introspection. This is not what the readership comes to sword and sorcery stories for. Try for overt conflicts, plenty of physical action, and rapid plot movement. That is, if they're plotting to overthrow the barbarian king in chapter one, by chapter two, the palace should be invaded by Serpent Men of Valusia, and in chapter three, the hero is magically whisked away to the Black Crypt of N'Kai. You get the idea.Why do I bring this up?
Because that's the framework I use for Kat and Mouse (albeit SF rather than sword and sorcery) and I hope I'm true to it.
*in How to Write Tales of Horror, Fantasy & Science Fiction, edited by J.N. Williamson